What are your opinions on spanking a child?
Posted on 07 November 2008 by admin
When i was growing up, whenever i did something that i wasn't suppose to do, i would get a spanking with the belt. I was always scared of that damn belt too, lol. But i grew to learn that if i didn't want that belt on my butt, then i better listen and do as told. Now as i have a child, all of these concerns are coming to the surface about spanking children. What are everyones opinions on this important topic?
there is a huge difference between spanking a child and beating them. spanking is part of discipline. i got the same punishments you got as a child. children learn when something is wrong if they are permanently remembered of what can happen if they do something they're not supposed to do. i don't think there is anything wrong with spanking your child as long as you, as well as your child, know why they're getting punished. the problem begins when spankings turn into twisted games where the child literally has done nothign wrong and still gets "beaten". bruises are from beatings…lessons come from spankings.
It should be allowed. But not torturous beatings that last more than 20 seconds
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Every once in a while it is a necessary evil…
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spare the rod, spoil the child, look at Paris Hilton!
My mom sure got her share of butt wallops in when my sister and I were kids!
{ and GOD!! we turned out just fine!}
Imagine that
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Children learn by example. Spanking teaches them its ok to hit. So if you dont think its ok for your child to hit, dont spank. If you're all for it, then spank them. Just dont be a hypocrite.
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spanking teaches ur kid a good lesson, i aways got spanked and thats how i learned. not spanking ur kid is like spoiling them.
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I don't think that you should spank your children with a BELT, my mom used to use her hand, which I think is alright. You should stop spanking your children when they're 7 or 8 though, that'll probably make them feel uncomfortable!!
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spanking yes but it depends on what the child did. but not with a belt.Never with a Belt
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when they are toddlers and get into things that could hurt them, but can't understand about NO!, then a swat on the butt or hand is fine. when they get old enough to talk to, another punishment should take the place of the swat. or have a reward system in place for good behavior.
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wow…hmm. i got spanked as a kid too. I wouldn't say it is particularly scarring, but i think its bad. It is a a part of my childhood that i do not like looking back at. I would not want to spank my kids if i had kids. Don't spank too hard. Its not ok to use a belt or stick.
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I can say thesame I was scaredof a spankin too and It kept me in line. I think Its important to spank if need
Spare the rod spoil the child
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Don't let them have bicycle helmets either.
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Hey, I lived.
I don't think it is neccessary to spank. You should be able to talk it out. As a kid I was never spanked and I turned out great.
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Always as the last resort if you need immediate behavior adjustment and not in public. Proper communication between you and the child is always the primary measure. Listen to the child's need.
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I have a 4 years old boy
i dont think this is the right way to go… cuz once you teach the child this Spanking behavior.. his violence Side will grow.. and She\he will start using it in many of their relationship problems
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nursery
Do it, but not with a belt, and not while angry. Allow yourself time to cool off, and use an inanimate object, like a switch or light stick, only on the bottom. Also, don't hold a grudge, use the 'silent treatment' or keep haranging your kid (verbally) afterwards. Be swift, but fair, and don't punish honest mistakes; for willfull disobedience, after giving them ONE warning, and follow through. If they still don't listen, or talk back afterwards, etc. then you can use taking away priveleges, grounding, timeouts, etc. I found it very effective to get my oldest to look in the mirror and ask himself why he was getting in trouble, and who was responsible, and what he had done to deserve it. This "self-talk" always seemed to break through the parent/child communication wall.
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As long as it's not abusive….and not with a belt, maybe a hand slap……unless your child is a jerry springer moment! then you may need dr. phil or smth
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If the kid does something bad anuff hell yeah. One of mine ran into the street and I slapped her butt she never did it again.
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there is a huge difference between spanking a child and beating them. spanking is part of discipline. i got the same punishments you got as a child. children learn when something is wrong if they are permanently remembered of what can happen if they do something they're not supposed to do. i don't think there is anything wrong with spanking your child as long as you, as well as your child, know why they're getting punished. the problem begins when spankings turn into twisted games where the child literally has done nothign wrong and still gets "beaten". bruises are from beatings…lessons come from spankings.
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i don't spank alot and if i do i use my hands on his butt. i don't like using tools to hit my son with and i don't like hitting anywhere else other then his butt, hand or legs.
sometimes when i give my son a time out, he will not stay there so i give him a whack on the butt and wah lah, he stays. now he knows i mean it when i tell him to stay on time out and i don't have to touch him.
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The only thing you should keep in mind is that you should do so out of love and not anger, remember this an you will be fine.
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that's the problem with kids today, theres not enough discipline if parents did there job kids would be better off. most parents today grew up being spanked, and they were better off for it
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In my opinion teaching children respect through fear is less productive then teaching them why they are disciplined for there actions and showing them what they should do the next time around. We are there teachers and we're here to guide them. I was spanked as a child and all I can remember is worrying about the next time it would happen and not why I was being disciplined.
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When is a responsible spanking bad? It's not. Spankings given with love and maturity have been teaching children about discipline and respect for ages.
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hitting a child is wrong.
But disciplining one is MANDATORY.
I suspect, parents are feeling 'black mailed'.
Especially in the heat of the moment, parents refrain from disciplining their children HARD.
Kids these days are growing up 'later' in life, 20's and not in their late teens. Kids live at home, in part due to expensive real estate prices, but mainly because, they have no reason to move. Parents are too easy on their children. And don't PUSH them fwd enough!? I vividly remember the "last" push my parents gave me, and that was when i was 13 and 14.
I hated them at the time for it, but NEVER regret the push.
I became more self disciplined, and did better in school too.
ie/ My mother use to take me to swimming lessons, every saturday morning. I HATED IT! and until i was 14, i saw the light at the end of the tunnel! and that was, i could become a life guard / swimming instructor! Payed twice or almost three times the min wage. Working my summers, i met tons of friends, had fun and saved enough money to pay my way through university!
thanks mom
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I think it is necessary sometimes, but should never be done with more than a hand and more than is needed to teach the lesson.
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i think if the child really deserves it, then spank them, but don't use that as a resource for every little thing, and don't leave marks
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I got spanked at a young age.
As I grew, it turned to groundings. I think it worked pretty well.
Kids really don't understand grounding at a young age. Or, in fact, time outs (which is nothing more than a mini-grounding). But they do understand when their rear ends hurt. You gotta use the technique that will get through to them what is correct behavior and what is not.
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i believe its a good thing for the child in the long run i was spanked when i was a child and looking back i deserved all of it lol but it taught me that my action have consequences and i wish all my parents did was send me to my room that would have been a reward for me when you spare the rod you spoil the child and it will be hard for them to get into the real world cause when you mess up they don't send you to your room were your comfortable they send you to room were there is a guy named buba and i dont have to explain the rest
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You have to know yourself. Are you the type of person who can stay calm and discipline properly while a disrespectful child is staring you down? Or are you the type to lose it very easily. If you are the last one, you shouldn't spank because of the risk of going overboard. Spanking gets a bad rap because of people who cannot control their temper when they discipline. A loving mother who wants to correct a child's behavior by giving a little swat on the behind, should not be condemned. ALWAYS explain to the child after the fact that you love him or her and you only discipline because you love him or her. There needs to be closure after-wards and then go back to what you were doing with the child, like nothing happened, that teaches forgiveness.
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Discipline of all sorts, including corporal punishment, is necessary. If I ever had to, I would do it without hesitation. But there is a big difference between discipline and beating your child senseless.
I can guarantee you any child of mine wouldn't wind up in the emergency room of the local hospital, either as a result of a belt to the butt or of being popped in the mouth when he tells his mom to f*** off.
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It even says in the Bible to discipline your child. Don't beat a child of course but a swift slap to the bum won't mentally destroy a child. You need to show the child that he/she can't get away with everything. I was spanked along with my 4 brothers and we all came out fine. Some people are just anal about it…oh and don't do it in front of people or else some idiot is gonna go over board and call child services on you for trying to tell your child no. Also, let the child know WHY he/she is getting spanked so they learn.(now let's count how many times i used the word "child.")
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"Tap the Toosh", lol. I believe in spanking, but I also believe that you should love your children more than you chastise them. I got spankings ALL THE TIME, but deep down I knew the difference – I knew I wasn't being abused, I was being punished and had NO DOUBT that my parents loved me. Its all in the approach. Don't beat your child, but sometimes a spanking is warrented.
Good Luck!!
Spare the rod, spoil the child!
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I have two boys and have only had to spank them each once. It was because of the way I did it. I made them tell me why they were going to get a spanking but I let then think about there answer for a half hour before I wanted an answer. Then I gave them the choice of time they wanted to get it, it had to be done that day. And last I had them bend over a stool. The spanking in it's self lasted 15 seconds, and the sting was gone in minutes. But they never forgot the waiting! After it was over, we hugged and I told them I loved them and was sorry it came down to this, but made them understand it was there actions that brought this about. I never had to do it again, and I receive nothing but compliments from family and friends on how nice and well behaved my kids are.
Good luck!
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I, too, was spanked with a belt – sometimes it was difficult to sit without crying. So spanking with a belt is verboten. I think the only time you spank a child is to get his/her attention. One swift spank to the buttocks with the hand should do it. If you need more than that, it's too late. Discipline and respect should be taught before a child is old enough to go to school.
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Spanking does not teach that hitting is ok. I hate when people say that. Spanking can be abusive when it is used out of anger and when it crosses the line into a beating. Children need to learn that there are consequences for their actions. If a certain behavior is continued even after time-outs, or revoked prevlidges, then maybe they need a smack on the tush. A child should be spanked because a parent (who is not seething with anger at the time) wants what is best for their child and decides that they need to put a consequence on a specific action. For example: My nephew would always go outside without permission. He was tall enough to unlock the door, so nothing could really keep him inside. He had countless time-outs, actually, he would give himself time-outs (that's how ineffective they had become). He had toys taken away and he was yelled at. One time he went outside and into a neighbor's backyard. No one could find him. When his dad did find him, he took him inside and gave him a spanking. He now asks if he can go outside.
Kids should not be spanked in public.
I also want to add that children who are under two should not be spanked and once they reach around 10-ish they should not be spanked either. They should know what they are being spanked for AND they should not be spanked for everything. If a child is spanked all the time, it will lose it's effectiveness. When a behavior is particularly bad (or dangerous ie: running into the street) then a spanking can be administered.
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Hi, I think you need to spank your child when they are doing some thing real bad. That way they know what there are doing is not right. After you spank your child you should always tell them way you did it. That way they understand why there wore spank.
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there are so many other ways to disipline a child that a child will learn from…. instead do grounding, time-out, privalages taken away, a disipline chart…..
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My son is only 2 months. and im still debating how im going to disipline him. i was spanked hard with the belt when i was in my teens. i think thats wrong…. i also had a tree branch used un my bottom. ouch!!! I never got hit with the hand only belt or what ever else. even had to pull my pants down… I wont do that. i think ill spank only with my hand if i see thats the only way ill get my point across like hes going to touch the hot stove….my husband didnt get spank alot and he was naughty when he was under 5…but his mom also had cancer…
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if kids have done something bad (or adults some of us need it at times to) it's ok for parents to spank them around. However before resorting to spanking parents should try and teach them in words to give them a warning and so they know what they've done wrong.
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That belt didnt hurt you. You learn to do what was asked of you. The belt will not hurt your child. The child will respect you. This is why society is like it is today. Parents are to scared to whip a butt now and then.
I have 2 teenagers and they both know I will still bust a butt if they get out of line.
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If done at a young age (from beginning) it works and wont have to be implemented to often again (when done right). If you try to start it when child is older- may be to late. It's ends up not working. If child has any mental disabilities- may not work either.
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Spanking is for idiots.
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I'll get thumbs down, so middle finger up at y'all thumbs downers IN ADVANCE.
As a person who used to get the plank of wood across the back or the steel cap boots I would never do that to my child. I discipline my son the best way with a smack on the backside or on the hand but never with anything other than my own hand. Its too risky too many ways to lose your kids.
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i am 15 and get spanked for misbehaving. i am usually pretty good but there are times where i can be very bad. then out comes the paddle and before i know it i'm over one of my parents knee, naked and crying. it keeps me in line…most of the time.LOL
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In my psychology classes NONE of my professors spanked their children and we learned in class the statistics of what kind of problems it can cause for them. Let me just throw a couple of things out there for you to think about but ultimately it is your decision.
1. Are you spanking your child to make you feel better because you are angry?
2.Does spanking them actually show them how to change the behavior that is a problem?
3. Spanking is easier for parents than thinking of creative ways to discipline their children that actually teaches them something positive.
4. Discipline should not just be about stopping certain behaviors, it also should include teaching the correct or desired behavior.
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